Stop Asking God to Fix you
Stop asking God to fix you, because He won’t.
Sounds pretty harsh doesn’t it?
Well, its true.
God is not going to take away that temptation in your life, and He won’t change how you feel about your boss/spouse/friend/parent/other. He won’t take away that guilt you feel because you actually feel that way about them either.
God gave you freewill, and He didn’t do so to simply violate it, just because we ask Him to.
He isn’t going to step in and magically make your life better. In fact, if you truly start following Jesus, and begin setting boundaries in your life, and begin living like Christ, learning to tame your tongue, cleanse your heart, and change your misdeeds, the shit will most definitely hit the proverbial fan, you will not only struggle internally with yourself, you will face resistance snd resentment from the outside and you will be on your knees wondering what you are doing wrong.
So don’t listen to the lies that say Christ is simply a crutch, and Christianity just helps us sleep better at night. It simply isn’t true. Life is (keyword being “is” rather than “was”) a hell of a lot easier and more pleasurable when I live for myself rather than for Christ. Trust me, I’d know because I turn from Christ and live for self far more often than I’d ever admit if you pressed me in person.
But fear not, for this is where God’s grace comes in like the proverbial gift that keeps on giving, because the King of all creation is near you most intimately when you are experiencing the difficulties and trials of living correctly in Christ, and He hasn’t forsaken or abandoned you. Quite the contrary, He is always with you, but it is in these moments of despair when we are most poignantly perceptive to His presence.
At this point you may be wondering, “wait a minute, didn’t you start this by telling us to stop asking God to fix stuff?”
Why, yes, yes I did, but that is because it is true. God does not force change in us, He facilitates it. He doesn’t fix you, He shows you what is wrong, what you (keyword you) need to do to change it, and when you ask Him, trust Him, and place your faith in Him, He will provide everything else needed for you to bring about that change in your actions, attitudes and/or affections, and He is right there with you should you need encouragement, advice, or simply someone to vent to.
I mean, honestly, what would be the point of giving us freewill, if God planned on simply fixing every problem we have for us when we whine to Him about them?
And yes, that is exactly what many of our prayers are like to God; immature adults whining about problems we ourselves created, yet we often indignantly expect God to magically fix everything for us because we asked Him “in Jesus’ name.”
We wouldn’t learn anything at all if God just fixed our lives every time something went wrong. He wants us to learn and grow in understanding and maturity, and that only happens when we stop whining, and start putting in the quite literal blood, sweat, and tears (lots of tears) needed to accept the filthy, rotten broken reality of our sin-stained selves, and start the life-long journey of surrendering our lives to Christ, one step at a time.
Speaking of time, its time for a Reality Check.
If you are reading this and thinking that most or even just some of your problems aren’t related to you per se, but are rather things or people in your life that are beyond your control, then there is something you need to understand.
The vast majority of the problems in your life aren’t the circumstances or people in your life, your problem is YOU, and how you react to those situations and people when they affect your life negatively.
Let that sink in for a moment and see if it isn’t true.
Usually your problem is the fact that you lack boundaries in some specific area of your life. Instead of being responsible for yourself, and letting others be responsible for themselves, you are either trying to control the actions, reactions and emotions of others and/or else you are giving over control of your reactions and emotions to other people (or the circumstances and happenstances) in your life.
God created us to have boundaries, and He respects these boundaries. This is why God won’t fix you. You alone are responsible for your actions and reactions, your words and your thoughts, and God isn’t going to step in and fix you. You need to do it yourself, but God doesn’t leave you alone to do it by yourself. He will guide and facilitate you as you go.
If you want to be free from the control others inadvertently (and sometime intentionally) wield over your temperament, time, and talents, then you need to learn how to set and enforce boundaries. I am currently reading through the book Boundaries by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend right now, and it is an excellent place to get a biblically based perspective on what Boundaries are, and how to start creating and enforce them in your life.
So remember, God doesn’t force change, He facilitates it. Stop praying that He will fix you, and definitely stop praying that He will fix that troublesome person or people, or that He will change that crappy circumstance in your life.
Rather, start praying that God will open your eyes and grant you the strength to see where you are wrong, ask Him for wisdom and guidance in how or what you need to change, and for courage to keep pressing onward through the trouble and muck that most certainly lies ahead in your struggle to free yourself from your biggest enemy: yourself. And always remember to thank Him constantly for the grace He grants you every moment of every day as you journey this wonderful, mysterious, and temporal time we call life.
For without Him, we are hopeless and lost, but through His light we can see and if we persevere to the end, we will be rewarded for all the hard work, both now and forevermore.